4 Ways to Deal with the Loss of a Pet

By Lauren Puckett

For most of us, losing a pet is like losing a member of the family. The sense of loss can be profound. As you go through the stages of grief, here are four ways to help you cope with the loss of your beloved companion.

1. Acknowledge your grief

It’s important to be open to your emotions, rather than ignoring them. Don’t try to “be strong” or push your sad thoughts aside. Rather, allow yourself to cry and acknowledge the loss. Work through your feelings and embrace the memories of your beloved pet. Don’t question your grief or compare it to the experience of losing a friend or relative. The American Veterinary Medical Association explains, “Your grief is normal, and the relationship you shared with your special friend needs to be mourned.”

2. Reach out to others

Seek support from your family and friends, especially those who have lost a pet themselves. You may also want to consult with your doctor or therapist. Additionally, the Humane Society of the United States recommends these resources for coping with the loss of a pet:

• The Pet Compassion Careline, which provides 24/7 support with trained grief counselors
• Lap of Love, which provides grief courses and pet loss support groups
• Everlife Support Groups, a directory of pet loss support groups by state

3. Maintain your routine

During a difficult time, you may not feel like eating or sleeping, but it’s important to take care of yourself. “Letting yourself get run down physically can make you feel worse emotionally,” explains ASPCA Pet Insurance. Maintaining your normal routine will help. If you have other pets, this is especially important for their well-being, too. Make sure to feed and walk them as usual.

4. Memorialize your pet

Do something to remember your pet, such as holding a funeral. HelpGuide.org notes, “A funeral can help you and your family members openly express your feelings. Ignore people who think it’s inappropriate to hold a funeral for a pet, and do what feels right for you.” Other ideas to memorialize your pet include:

• Spread your pet’s ashes or keep them in a special place in your home.
• Incorporate your pet’s ashes into pet cremation jewelry (try Spirit Pieces or Perfect Memorials).
• Plant a tree or shrub in honor of your pet. You can even have a memorial stone engraved and place it at the base.
• Create a memory box with your pet’s collar or favorite things.
• Share photos and memories online via social media or a specialized website (the Association for Pet Loss and Bereavement allows you to create one).
• Write a letter to your pet or the story of your last days together.

For immediate support, contact the Cornell University College of Veterinary Medicine’s Pet Loss Support Hotline at 607-218-7457, Monday through Friday, 6-9 p.m. EST and Saturday and Sunday, 12-9 pm EST.